Another problem with standing at big grounds for me was always getting a get spec and keeping it. I used to queue up at the Street End before the gates opened in order to get a good spec at the front of the ledge half way up the terrace.

Then, because I was often on my own and had no-one to keep my spec for me, I'd have to go for a p1ss and lose my good spec to people that had wandered in at five to three from the pub anyway.

In those days I could keep it in till the match was over, but nowadays with my middle-aged bladder I'd have to either lose my spec and reapply about four times over during the match or just revert to being a dirty Kopite and use the rolled up newspaper technique.